Pagan Spirit Gathering: Part 2, A Review

Pagan Spirit Gathering was not my first festival, but this was my first time seeing so many pagans in one spot.  Before I traveled to this fest in particular, I had been to ones with about 300-500 attendees.  This one had nearly 1000 people.  It was an awesome experience to be surrounded by that many pagans.  So I a writing this review based on my experiences at previous festivals and I hope to do my best to describe the feelings I felt while in attendance. 

What I Liked

I liked the sense of community that all of us shared together.  It felt nice to be able to be free and not have to hide anything about my primal pagan side.  Most of the people were open too, I only felt that closed off energy from 1 or 2 people I came across.  I also liked the set up of the day.  Workshops were held after lunch time, leaving time for people to sleep in, get up and get moving and still not have to miss a workshop.  I also liked that so many people lit torches at night around their tents.. it was almost impossible to see otherwise and I do not like tripping over tent stakes. 


What I loved

I loved many things about this festival.  I loved the quality of the workshops, which as I discussed with Selena Fox, I have had bad experiences with in the past.  I actually went to a local meet up with workshops that had a girl just reading us her tarot book instead of actually teaching the workshop.  Here at PSG, the people actually knew what they were talking about and made me feel like I could learn something.  When you have been involved with paganism as long as I have, that is hard to find. 

I also loved the Rituals.  I have never been one for public rituals.  A combination of being empathic and me not feeling comfortable with the way other people do rituals has always turned me off to them.  The way they were done at PSG, they were very open to many paths.  During the Croning ritual, Selena instructed us to connect to the universe or deity of our choice in the tradition that we connected to most.  And that made me feel comfortable enough to actually enjoy the ritual at hand. 

The shopping was incredible.  The items that people had were mostly hand made.  It was so nice to be able to browse and find things that were one of a kind pieces of art.  And to be able to see them up close and personal and feel the energy first hand that was put into their creation.  Wonderful.  If you plan to go to PSG in the future I suggest taking money, and cash, since the ATM kept crashing from all the use of the WiFi at the site.  Don't be surprised if you are wanting to spend 100$ or more. 

What I would have changed

All of my major beefs with the festival were all related to the actual site.  I would have had more flush toilets, and cleaned them more often.  And more showers.  I would suggest some outdoor showers or more just because of the lines we had to wait on to get there.  And be warned, your feet will not be clean till at least 2 showers are taken once you are home. 


If you plan to go

Bring socks to sleep in,  it got chilly at night and this was the best way to keep my nasty dirty feet from making a mess and to stay warm.  Do not plan to go online.  I still cant figure out why people would want to be online at a place like this, but the network was constantly crashing from overuse.   Bring cash, make a budget and bring that amount of cash for the whole trip.  Bring extra clothes, it got very muddy, and chilly at night.  Bring flip flops for the shower, they are gross and hard on the feet.  Prepare to take the quickest shower of your life.  Just go for the entire week unless you literally can not take the time off work.  Bring pre-made cards with your contact info on them to exchange with others whom you wish to stay in contact with. 

The Bottom Line

I will be going again, next time for a full week.  The only thing that could keep me from going would be that I couldn't afford it or I was medically unable. 

Pagan Spirit Gathering: Part 1, My Personal Experience.

I recently attended Pagan Spirit Gathering in Earlville, IL.  hosted by circle sanctuary and Selena Fox.  I am still "recovering" from this.  My kitchen has a few camping items left out that are in the process of being washed..but my once mud soaked clothes are now hanging to dry, the bedding is cleaned and put away and I feel a strong connection to my faith and the earth that can not even be described in words. 

I traveled from my small town in Independence, IA with the other 2 pagans in our town, we dubbed ourselves the Independence Iowa Pagan Alliance for shits and giggles and travel the 3ish hour drive to the festival.  We used our GPS and from the road all you could see was a little drive way.   Once we pulled in, we were in a different world.  We were welcomed with open arms and being that this was our first time at the festival we were greeted with people calling us "virgins" and asked to ring a bell..I rang that bell with all my might and we were welcomed home. 

I have been to several other festivals in the past, such as Phoenix Phyre, but this was the largest one I have ever attended.  What I liked about this fest is that it was so big that we were literally tent to tent and were forced to get to know our neighbors.  When we arrived, which we just went for the weekend instead of the full week, all of the shaded camping areas were filled and we had to open tent in the quieter area.  I wasn't happy about it when we got there, because I fully intended to stay up till 5 am each night enjoying night time festival activities.  However, I was more than happy with being there when I didn't stay up till 5 am partying like a maiden. 

I was not able to attend any workshops the first day because we were still unloading and setting up camp at the time, but we were able to chat with our tent city neighbors and met some really nice people.  We chatted and shopped around the merchants row area, which highly impressed me.  There were over 20 vendors (probably even double that) and not many that had the same crap you see at every pagan shop that is made in china.  Most of the vendors had homemade goods that were unique and very calling to me.  I really wish I had about 500 bucks to spend there, because I would have spent it all between the crystal balls and hand made goddess outdoor hangings, or the hand carved statues.    I came home with a CD by Emerald Rose (which I forgot to have signed.. boo), a handmade deer skin and quartz necklace for my son, a new goat skin head for my djembe and the biggest mortar and pestle I have ever seen. 

That night I attended the festivities which several drinking parties were commencing.  There were hoards of half naked women and men in kilts and loin cloths, and even people dressed like Pan.  I do not remember many parts of that night because the jungle juice is still clouding my brain (I only had one after my few glasses of wine with din din).  But I can say that it highly messed with me.  I thought the bull frogs from the swimming pond were following me and started yelling curse words at them at 2am.   I had walked about 5 times back and forth from my tent to the bathroom to the party and I probably stumbled drunkenly about a total of 5 miles that night.   I danced around the drum circle a bit and sat down and enjoyed it allot.  I got to meet a nice drum troop that fully reminded me that I am so not a maiden anymore!

The next day I woke up after about 3 or 4 hours of sleep and I got up early to try and beat the rush to the showers.. but I was wrong.  I had to wait over an hour to shower, but the blessing was that Selena Fox was online right behind me and I got to chat with her and I must say I was impressed!  Most pagan festivals I have attended, all the bigger named people tend to either go to a hotel instead of camp out, or have very private area.  But she was waiting on the line with the rest of us as an equal.  She was a very nice woman and very charismatic and funny.  I don't think I have ever felt someone have such naturally happy energy.  I also attended a few rituals she hosted during my short stay and I was even impressed with those because the way she did it was very polite and welcoming of everyone's beliefs.  I definitely will be checking out gatherings at Circle Sanctuary (about 3 hours away from me) for the near future. 

I went to the morning meeting and afterwards attended 2 different workshops.  Both of these workshops had a strong effect on me.  One was a guided meditation that just opened me up and brought me into the feeling of community at the festival.  The other was about using the Charge of the Goddess in every day life that was just wonderful. 

That night was the main ritual that was the biggest ritual I had ever seen, with nearly 1000 people.  It was allot of standing and walking but beautiful in its own way.  Afterwords we sat at our camp and chatted all night with a crone that came by with popcorn and marshmallows to share.  We chatted all night and shared stories and ideas about life and paganism.  It was so nice to be able to chat so openly. 

The entire experience renewed my sense of pagan community and opened up things in my personal life that I needed to handle on my own.  I felt healed and energized and came home with some new ideas.  I will be definitely going next year and going for the entire week. 

Blossoming Jasmine Journal- Entry 1

We all have things in our head that we want to do with our lives.  I get an idea and see myself going for it, but eventually it just fizzles out and I don't get it done.  Well I have recently decided that I want to get working on some of these things.   I don't want to say to myself anymore that I will do them and just not.  I want to personally thank my online friend Amy Waters for giving me the title for this venture of mine.  I wanted to be able to portray the idea that this was similar to a bucket list, but it was more about living not about things I wanted to do before dying.  The name she suggested fit this perfectly, good job Amy!  I want to blossom in my life and I hope that sharing this publicly, I will be able to stick to it and honor these ideas fully.  So I will start this by creating a list of things I want to do and I will begin working on them over time.  I also encourage you to do something similar and I also encourage you to share it too.  So here is my first list of things I currently want to work on:

Jasmine's Cupboard-  I have been working on this idea for about 5 years now.  I want to sell my home made herbal creations and I have been piddling about doing it.  I have the majority of the things I need to get started, and even some stuff ready to sell at any time.   But I get to my Etsy page and I freak out when I am about to put something up for sale.  Its the part where they want me to pay a fee to place something up for sale.  What if no one buys it and I waste the money I spent listing it?  What if I undercharge for shipping and end up loosing money?  What if no one likes the items I make...  but I know people love what I make, I get compliments on it all the time. 

Working Out-  I have a huge list of exercises I want to do.  Yoga, belly dance, tai chi, ballet... yep they all call to me.  I just need to step away from all of my other work I am constantly doing and just go for it.  When I was growing up I used to be a ballet dancer and a Baton Twirler (I even was on a national championship winning team) and I spent literally the first half of my life moving around.  I need to reconnect with this part of me and the excuses need to stop.  I plan on starting with a new book I just bought on my kindle (yay I found a sale last week) that teaches you to do 15 minutes of yoga in bed before you get out of bed each morning.  I need to read it this week. 

Healthy Eating-  Just because I have cut things out of my diet that I think are unhealthy doesn't give me room to eat crap because I have finally stopped eating other things.  I feel that this is almost a cross addicting thing for me because I give up coffee and then I find myself sneaking dr. pepper's more often and breaking my code of "no more than one pop per week".  I also hate bread I have discovered.  I love good Italian bread and homemade breads but really I just need to get rid of the idea of crappy carbs all together.   I eat allot of whole grains but I catch myself sneaking crackers and cookies that I just don't need.  I think that I should just stick to spinach wraps honestly... and I need to start having my morning smoothie again.. when I drank those I lost like 20 pounds in a month! 

The Goddess Series- Gaia.

Whether it's Gaia, Gaea or Ge, the theories concepts and stories surrounding this goddess and scientific theory are all fascinating. I first came into contact with Gaia from the idea and theory that all life is connected together. It is a fascinating theory and is pretty popular among certain circles of pagans. The idea of Mother Earth has always been a popular concept with general society. A combination of myths and theories has evolved Gaia to be a very important Goddess to consider in our paths.

Writing this, however, has made me feel a little like the terracotta Gaia in the picture at the left. There is so much information to sift through on the internet, but when it comes to finding her in classical mythology, it becomes almost irritatingly bleak. Gaia tends to get reduced to small paragraphs that describe her as "name for the earth" or "Greek personification of the earth as a goddess". If you travel to some of the sites I have listed, you will see that some of them span pages beyond pages of information on Gaia. I found separating information based on the original mythology and archeological research, and which is based on personal gnosis and belief has been a challenge. However understanding each of these aspects is important to understanding the importance of Gaia to our society today.

Mythology

Gaia was the grandmother of Zeus, mother of Titans, Cyclops, and more in ancient Greek mythology. She represented what we would call today "Mother Earth". Some call her the first female, some consider her the ultimate creator in Greek mythology. She was born of pure chaos, and birthed the sky, and then went on to bare more children with the sky. She was described by Hesiod as having birthed the heavens to surround herself in and be a home for the gods. If any single goddess can be credited with the "Mother Earth" title, Gaia is it.


Gaia Thesis

In July of 1971, Oberon Zell wrote a paper for the Green Egg, titled THEAGENESIS: The Birth of the Goddess, introducing the concept of the earth being an interconnected spiritual force. Now I have never been a huge Oberon Zell fan, but I do like the way he presented his ideas for this particular article. He broke the idea down to the cellular level and then compared the Earth itself to the human body. On the cellular level he states that when a cell reproduces or divides, it leaves part of itself in each of the new cells. This idea connects every living organism on the cellular level. He goes on to further explain how different ecosystems are like organs in a body. Each one has a different role to play on making the entire unit work. Natural disasters and weather are a part of this unit, everything that happens on the Earth is geared towards the greater good of itself as an organism seeking its own survival.




Gaia Theory

In the 1960's, James Lovelock came up with the theory that the earth was a self regulating all encompassing organism. It uses all life and even non-living compounds to regulate the environment for the best possible conditions for life. An example of this process is clouds formed over open oceans. Algae from the ocean emits a large sulfur molecule, which is then becomes the condensation nuclei for raindrops. Eventually the cloud moves to land and the sulfur molecule returns to the terrestrial ecosystems. Many processes on the Earth have been measured with this theory including global temperature, atmospheric content, ocean salinity, and others.  Solid research and development is always coming to light in regards to this theory and backing it up. If you are a scientific mind, you should definitely look at some of the research out there.

My Thoughts

I love the idea and theory that the Earth is a single organism in itself. What I don't agree with is that we refer to it as a woman or a Goddess. Yes, I believe that the earth in itself is a divine force, but a balanced one that is genderless. But the Earth itself is comprised of duality on many levels. We create life by the joining of male and female to make a new being. Oberon Zell claims that even genderless organisms are referred to as females in the scientific community. However, when it comes to the aspect of Divinity of the organism of the Earth, I feel that it is important to distinguish between genderless and gendered. When doing scientific research, it is said that by simply observing a subject, we change it. By giving a gender to the Earth, we are changing the nature of it. We try to view the Earth based to our predetermined ideas of a woman by giving it a gender, when it not always is. Viewing it without gender allows us to see the Earth as a more natural and primal force, the breath of life. When we only view half of the duality, we are given an unbalanced world view.

Regardless of the gender of the Earth, I think that it is most important to consider the idea of the earth being all connected into one unit. It connects us all with every person and culture, with every rock and stone, with ever plant, we are all here for survival and survival of the planet is crucial for all of us. If we all incorporate this idea into our daily lives, we become more aware of what we do to each person and our environment, we are doing to ourselves and the planet as a whole. This in turn allows us to actively see the changes we make on the individual scale, change the world.  Raising our children to be good conscious Earth loving individuals is better for us all. What we are doing as mothers and parents is one of the most important jobs we have ever had. If this is the lesson the goddess Gaia has for us than she too can earn her place as one of the great mother Goddesses.

Resources

Gaea: terra-cotta statuette. [Photograph]. In Encyclopædia Britannica. Retrieved from http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/media/5606/Gaea-terra-cotta-statuette-from-Tanagra-Greece-in-the-Musee

Bulfinch's Mythology, Thomas Bulfinch, 1855.  

http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/223365/Gaea
http://original.caw.org/articles/theagenesis.html
http://www.paleothea.com/SortaSingles/Gaia.html
http://www.ancient-mythology.com/greek/gaea.php
http://www.theoi.com/Protogenos/Gaia.html
http://www.gaiatheory.org/
http://www.jameslovelock.org 

On Pagans and Criticism: An Editorial.

For the past week I have been following several pagan boards, blogs and discussion groups.  Each of these groups has had their own drama to contend with.  The pagan mommy blogs have all been watching the unfolding of an issue with a ratings contest at Circle of Moms.  The boards have all been lit up with posts regarding others being mean to them, stating how they do not like criticism.  And finally, the discussion groups have all been in an uproar about more experienced and practiced pagans fighting with seekers and newbies.

First, before I go any further, I must explain that I try to avoid disagreements if at all possible.  This said, I also believe in speaking my mind, especially when someone questions the integrity of my path or those of my loved ones, or says something that is a flat out lie.  I do not believe in trying to change a persons path at all, but I do believe in helping people with offering what I can in the way of information and guidance.  I only offer it if it is asked of me or actively sought.  If I offer this help I expect to be respected for my knowledge, experience and opinion.  I also expect people not to assume that I will follow their personal dogma or adapt it to my practice in any form.  But ultimately I believe that the pagan community has many lessons to learn from each other as a community, and should value the lessons that everyone has to offer.

But not everyone is open to this.  An example, from one of the boards I travel this week, one woman posted a reply to a topic where she stated she didn't want to have anything to do with pagans who didn't follow the Rede.  I severely hope that I took this the wrong way, I'm really trying to give the benefit of the doubt.  However, how in the heck do you expect to come into a community looking to outreach to pagans if you can't even have an open enough mind to communicate with over half of them?  You can't be all "love and light" by avoiding so much, it defeats the purpose.  And I would love to help her and show her something new.  I would say to her that "not everyone believes in the Rede, including some Wiccans and this (insert long list) is why".  I would not expect her to understand them all but I would expect her to listen nicely and consider what i am saying.

Now on the discussion groups on Facebook, I am seeing pagans attempting to help people and state their firm yet researched opinions, and newbies flying at the elders and more learned pagans.  They call them names, attack them personally, attack their ideas and then cry out that they are being attacked when the person, trying to help them, defends themselves.  And this doesn't even matter that people are able to state multiple sources, the less experienced people still cry out "persecution".  In one instance, a pagan asked for someone to state their sources or tradition they practiced to further their own knowledge.  The other pagan flew at them, ignoring the request for a source, called them names, sent her husband to the discussion to call the person who questioned an idiot.  Seriously???!!!

I just don't get why pagans act like this.  When I was a newbie, this path was always referred to as "the path of the wise", and somewhere that has gone to the birds.  What ever happened to valuing elders and knowledge?  The part that bugs me about all of this is that you go on these same communities and find people begging for spells and saying they want to find a mentor.  It is disheartening, as a pagan who has studied for 15+ years, and as a person who is always seeking to further her path.

I did however get to see pagans coming together this week, a little glimmer of hope.  On the blogosphere, a contest is underway on Circle of Moms, that is seeking to find the top 25 faith based mommy bloggers.  A Christian mother attacked the pagan mothers and said that their faiths were not valid and should not be considered for the contest.  This lead to many pagan mommy bloggers teaming together to promote their blogs as a group to show that we are a strong community.  I am so proud to be a part of this movement, and hope to see many more actions like this.  The best part of this event was that it didn't matter if we agreed with each other or not, we were all attacked and stood together and I hope that one day we see more of this in the community.  And I know that this is asking allot because we are such a diverse group of people with so many different beliefs and histories, but I know that as a whole, pagans can get along.  Here's to wisdom!

The Goddess Series- Paleolithic Figures

One of the most popular figures related to ancient goddess forms is the Venus of Willendorf, one that I have been drawn too for over a decade. One of my first pagan jewelry items that I purchased was a mini amethyst Venus figure, which I was always able to get away with wearing because everyone always thought it was a bunch of grapes. I have always felt drawn to images from this period of human history, including cave art, earth art and of course, goddess figures.

There are several aspects that have always drawn me to these figures. First and most importantly, her shape. She reflects a natural and realistic view of a woman, instead of our modern emaciated models. She has a large flabby tummy, wide hips and enormous breasts. She also does not hide her body or attempt to hide her sexuality. In Sandro Botticelli, Birth of Venus, the figure actually hides her breasts and genitals and shows modesty. However, Venus of Willendorf places her arms above her breasts and displays them and her enlarged vulva for the world to see. She is exposed in all aspects and to me this is tied to embracing sexuality and womanhood fully. It shows her power as a woman and yet does not denigrate who she is. And lastly, she has no face, and thus she could be anyone and also a part of us all. Her anonymity also reflects a certain aura of her being beyond personification. If she had a face, it would distract from these Venus figures more womanly and openly fertile representations. Overall, when I see these figures I see a woman in her most fully primal state and it reminds me of the Goddess within myself.

There has always been some debate over the meanings behind these, the biggest being the battle over if these figures represented goddesses or not. Some believe they are representative of fertility and womanhood. Some think they were made by women to aid other women through menstruation, and child bearing. The Venus of Willendorf has a coating of red ochre, possible symbolism anyone? However, language and cultural barriers aside, no one is going back 25,000 years to ask the artist what the piece represented to them.

Regardless of what they represent, there is no doubt in my mind that these figures were made with an important agenda. Think about this. Can you go camping with nothing but hand tools and come back with a perfect replica of the Venus of Willendorf? I know that I couldn't not even if I used special tools designed for carving limestone. If someone spent the time and energy to make such a piece of art, wouldn't you think it was rather significant? Yes we see in our art world some things that have no meaning to us on a deeper and spiritual level, but they have some to the artist. If we look at it from an artists prospective, we still are given a high probability that this statue honored fertility and womanhood. One Carving in particular, The Venus of Laussel, carries a cornucopia in her hand with 13 notches on it. The number 13 is the same amount of lunar cycles in a year, which is paralleled by a womans cycle. Honoring these, is indicative that they too honored the feminine aspects of humanity on a larger scale. Even if these Venus figures are not goddesses, they represent a huge part of the female experience and should be honored as such.

There are lessons we can learn from these figures as spiritual beings ourselves, despite the meaning behind them. Be yourself and do not hide your femininity, embrace it and let your inner goddess shine. The scars of motherhood are not to be shamed, wear your hips, tummy, and breasts as a badge of honor. We may be very different from those who created these figures, but we still have a common tie through our womanly features, cycles and birth. Most importantly, we are surrounded by goddesses every day and they should be honored as such.


Resources

http://donsmaps.com/willendorf.html
http://arthistoryresources.net/willendorf/willendorfdiscovery.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_of_Laussel
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_figurines

MamaJasmine's Tomato Soup

I have been asked for this new recipe of mine recently and I figured here would be as good a place to share as any. Now this is originally derived from a recipe by Mimi Riser in, The Kitchen Witch Glossary to Cooking Herbs and Spices. I, as usual, tweeked her recipe for Fast Tomato Tarragon soup to my liking. This is a wonderful soup, which once you taste it, a can will never do again.

One thing everyone should know about how I do recipes is that with spices, I never measure by standard means. I use my hand and make a small cup and fill it by how much I think it needs. I stick with large handful, medium and small. I do this because I crush the herbs and spices with my thumb and release the oils in them.

Ingredients.

1 small onion, diced.
2 28oz cans of whole tomatoes
2 cloves of garlic, smashed and diced finely.
1 cup of organic chicken stock.
1 large handful of dried tarragon leaves
1 medium handful of basil
1 small handful of mint
1 large handful of sugar in the raw
sea salt and fresh cracked pepper to taste.
enough EVOO to coat your pan.

First Start off by sauteing the garlic and onions in the EVOO, slowly adding in the herbs. Once the onions are soft add in the tomatoes, chicken stock and sugar. Heat to boiling and then lower and simmer covered for 20-30 minutes, stirring occasionally. Once done transfer to blender (or use a handheld like me) and puree soup till it is of a smooth texture. I then let this simmer 5 extra minutes and then serve. Enjoy!

The Goddess Series- Intro

Yesterday Morning I went and got a new tattoo. I have been asking my husband to get a new tattoo for 8 months now (we always decide on things outside our budget together). Yesterday he finally said yes. I went to the tattoo shop and got a spiral Goddess on my right ankle. For me this is a symbol I have been wanting to get for a long time. I have been wanting to find ways on how to honor my inner Goddess. Being a Goddess is part of being a mother. We bring life into this world and nourish it and help it grow. We slowly plant the seeds of the seeds of the next generation and the future. This is an important job and in turn it is important to honor the Goddess within ourselves.

It is because of this that we will venture into, for the next few months or longer, the Goddess Series here at the Spiritual Mother. We will cover many aspects of goddesses including discussing different goddesses around the world, honoring her in yourself, teaching your children about goddesses and more. I can't wait to share this with you and want to remind all the women out there that you are a Goddess!

Mother's Day

Mother's Day, in my mind is a very important day for me spiritually. In fact I might consider it the most spiritual for me of all the traditional observed American holidays. Why? Well besides getting roses, breakfast in bed and getting to put my feet up most of the day, its about celebrating the beauty and wonder of the goddess through myself and all other mothers. It is a deep connection to the all through caring and our bodies bringing life into this world that ties us. It is also very important for non-mothers to honor their own mothers in their lives. So I wanted to share with you my experience for this past Mothers Day, not only what my family did for me, but how I honored the mother in myself.

- I slept in. I know I work hard taking care of myself, home business and my son and I owe it to myself and family to get extra rest when able.

- I enjoyed family time. My family is very important to me and I value every second we can spend together where work does not factor in. We even went to see all the cousins which was a special treat.

- I read a book. Not only because my husband got me a Kindle and I was excited to use it, but also because I value time where I can enrich my mind and grow on a spiritual level. This is also one thing I always want to do but rarely get time for.. and to be able to read for even 10 minutes is a blessing!

- I got a few things done that I had been putting off. One of the best perks of mothers day is that my husband helps out and tries to cover things I normally do in a day and gives me a full and complete day off. And now that thing that was in the back of my mind bothering me to get done is done. Not having to worry about one less thing being done is always a gift that keeps on giving.

- I ordered myself a new mother goddess pendant. I am so excited to get it and it will be worth the wait, but I needed to treat myself and find a new trinket to honor my motherhood.

- I meditated. Because alone time with nothing on my mind is always SWEET.



So what did you do for yourself this past mothers day?

I FAILED My Own Challenge...

A few months back I issued a challenge and I failed my own challenge. I fully planned to take this on wholeheartedly, but I must admit I did not force myself to do this. I planned on trying to be an eclectic pagan for 30 days and following the basics of that path. I posted on one of the forums I frequent, looking for suggestions and the basic response was, "Well, solitary eclectics get to do what ever they want so just go with what ever feels right". Well that was where I hit my problem.. my path already was what feels right. So I decided that I would go to my book shelf and pick out the first two books that called to me that I hadn't read in a while. So I picked up a book on shamanic healing that was loaned to me by a friend that I never looked at, and a book and cards kit on goddesses. I figured I would get familiar with both and then put together a shamanic goddess ritual for the next full moon. Well I tried..I picked up both and flipped through them several times. I tried to sit down and read them both. The problem was drive, I had no ambition to actually sit down and take time out of my day to read them. So there on my shelf by my bed the books sat. I would glance over at them saying to myself "I need to read those" but it just didn't happen.

My conclusions to this is that Solitary Eclectic was a bad choice on my part..I should have gone with something like Celtic Reconstructionism, Dianic or Buddhism, but Solitary Eclectic was way too broad. In the end we all follow what feels right to us, regardless if it has a certain structure or is a grab bag of ideas... If we didn't, we wouldn't follow it at all.

The Fever

It is spring and I look out my window and see robins doing a mating dance in my back yard. It is nap time here at my house and the relaxation music is flowing in the background. I feed my daycare baby a bottle as he looks up into my eyes with a loving glance, and I can feel it, the back of my mind wishing and longing to be pregnant.

To have another child of my own.. to see 2 pink lines on a pee stick.. to get to eat everything in sight.. to shop for maternity clothes.. pick out new baby items... get new clothes ready for them.. to see my son kiss my expanding belly..to be ready to get this darn thing out of me! To have my bags ready to go..to hold a newborn for the first time and let them nurse hungrily at my breast... to walk around my house with a tiny newborn in my sling and stare at them sleeping at any time..

My body feels the fever all over, like a twitch in the back of my head that connects to every part of me. To me this is one of the most natural feelings in the world, and even though at times it can be wrenching and cruel, I welcome it. It shows me that I am alive and in tune with nature and who I am through the very core of my being. It is the creation of the world, the gift of the Goddess. For it is through me that the Goddess lives, and through my womb she calls me home.

The Passing of Wisdom

This morning, my great Aunt Pauline passed away at age 95. She was my grandmothers sister, and the last person of my grandmothers generation to pass. She was my oldest living relative of course. I was lucky enough to be able to take my son to meet her in January when I was visiting my family out east. It hit me really hard to hear of this because she was the last connection to that generation in our family. I remember being a little girl and sitting around the kitchen table with her and hearing stories of their youth and their lives. It has always been amazing to me what that generation got to see in their life times. Imagine being born in 1916.. before we had the technology we have today.. living through the great depression, and both World Wars.. the 60's...the cold war... and getting to see the changes that we see today. She was also the first generation of our family to be born in this country, as my great grandparents immigrated from Italy before they were born. The wisdom that has passed today is something that is such a huge loss to our families...no longer will we get to hear stories of the youth of my grandmother and her family... I hope every person out there today takes time to honor those that have lived such great long lives, and touched so many people.

Chai

Since giving up coffee, I not only have lost 15 pounds (um big woohoo!), but I have also started a new romance with Chai. I drink at least a cup a day of it and have been trying different brands. Here is a review of these:

Good Earth Chai- I would love it way more if it didn't have licorice (anise) in it.. it kinda cancels out all the wonder of the other spices and its all I can taste... I like the price though.

Stash Black Tea and Chai- love it.. but why do I have a hard time finding it in the store.. boo hiss!

Stash Green Chai- Oh Em Gee.... this is a heavenly blend! I love that when you steep it in 1/2 milk 1/2 water it comes out such a pretty light shade of spring green.. it tastes wonderful with sugar in the raw too.

Celestial Seasonings Bengal Spice Chai- it is potent with the spices.. but I would like some caffeine please.. I'm a mother not a barbie doll.

Oregon Trail- the prices is blech.. the tea in the jugs was decent but such a waste of money... ya I know I should try the bags of you if you want a fair shake.

Local Indian Restaurant House Chai- the best chai ever when they brewed it... deep warm spices that were actually a touch on the real side of spicy.. I bought a box of it.. but it is a fine powder that when ever I add it to water it goes right through my tea strainer and leaves a nasty funky sludge on the bottom of my cup.. big Eeewww.... I guess I will have to go eat Indian food more because because the chai there was so good it was like the hottest actor or actress you can think of begging to give you oral...ya I know that is graphic.. but it was literally that good.

Hot Love

I was once told in a class for my daycare license that the difference between a love for a child from a mother and a day care provider was that a mothers love was hot and a providers love was warm. A mothers love is fierce, protective, deep, passionate and eternal. A providers love is giving, safe, and when needed. Having a Day Care in my home with my son as one of the kids has been a journey for me to balance my hot love for him out while trying to care for him and the other kids. On one hand I see my son in the way of a mother, trying to protect my young at any cost. On the other it is about being objective and helping all the children in a way that aids their development. This week that was balance was testing in a profound way for me.

On Monday one of my clients came to me and said that her 5 year old claimed that she was being bullied by my 2 year old son. She also said her 2.5 year old was saying "he hit me" over and over. This is the same child who every time was at my house would go to the window and whimper "I'm sorry mommy" over and over and rarely play in my care. The child who got owned by a 10 month old. The child who would only play with his sister, and when she was here the two children formed a clique and never would play with other children. The same child, who hit my son on the head repeatedly with a drum stick. When I took the drum stick away and told him that it was for the drum and using it on my son this was was not safe, he had a mental break down and screamed for 20 minutes. I have been working with kids almost 20 years now, and kids hit each other and take toys from each other all the time, especially 2 year old boys. This is normal behavior... and to hear that woman call my son a bully when he is acting within the normal diaspora for a toddler.. well my blood boiled. I was so mad I simply smiled and told her if she felt that way it was best not to come back, while in my head I was jumping at her like a protective lion clawing her face off. How dare she talk about my son like that, I was raging in my head. I wanted to scream at her and tell her that I thought there was something wrong with her son, that he was wimpy and low functioning emotionally. I have been tooling the scene through my head all week. Trying to put it out of my head.. which has been challenging. I keep reminding myself that this wasn't my fault and my son was being completely normal for his age.. and feeling sorry for that woman that she would assume that I would let her kids get hurt in my care, and that I wouldn't protect them. Feeling sorry for those kids because obviously they don't have a parent that would teach them to handle adversity and face the world head on, showing them how to handle dealing socially with different personalities. Teaching them to cower in fear for something so petty, it just boggles my mind. But despite that my "motherly" hot love has been taking over and.. Im just so angry! I have been meditating and trying to not think about it all week.. but ya.. I'm mad.. no matter what I tell myself. This was the first time for me to have my motherly instinct enraged...and I know it will be challenged again... Hopefully I find ways of coping and taming the beast within before the next time. How do you cope with your motherly hot love?

Spring Cleaning: The Spirit.

Taking care of our spirit is something that we as moms tend to put off..I know I do. During spring I like to take some extra me time and focus on my spiritual connection to the all. Reconnecting is always a deep experience.

-Take time to ponder how you are a goddess... that you are a mother and a creator of life...a vessel of love and a care taker. Feel the goddess pumping through your veins and treat yourself as such.

-Take a ritual bath. Cleanse your spirit by bathing in sea salt and focusing on all the bad stuff going down the drain. Anoint yourself with essential oils after, using your favorite flower oil.

-Sprinkle and smudge yourself and home. Concentrate on getting out all the negative energy in your home and the sea salt and water washing it away and the smoke working to clean it.

-Spiritually Sweep/besom your home. Focus on getting all the bad stuff just cleaned out of your house. Start at a door and work around your home room to room in one direction until you finally sweep out all the old energy out the door you started.

-Make time each day to Meditate. Take time to contemplate the wonders of spring.

-Set up a spring altar. Include eggs and flowers and and even pictures of your children and or small animals.

- Dye and Paint eggs with your kids with sygils or important spiritual symbols of your family.

-Plan a spring feast...Plan to celebrate Ostara, Easter, Spring Equinox...Maybe even Beltaine...But plan to do a feast to honor spring with your whole family. For me growing up I always associated spring with my grandma making the pizzagaina, so that might be what our meal is built around in our family.

-Have a Spring fling... Take extra time to flirt with that certain someone special and be reminded of the fertility of spring.

Dear Coffee....

Dear Coffee,

We have been in a toxic relationship for a while. We have been together for almost 20 years now. I remember sneaking you in my house when I was 10, going to school with you in high school, and surviving college with just you, and waking up thinking of you ever since. We have had many good times, but it has become very clear what you have done to me, slowly destroying me. You have not been supportive of me having a healthy lifestyle, tempting me with sweetened creams and fancy sugars, slowly adding to my waist line. I was obsessed, I needed you 5 times a day, drinking in your essences with a starving hunger. We recently took a break from each other and I discovered a few things. Without you, I feel healthier, I have tried new things like Chai and Earl Grey (they are soooo hot btw), I have been feeling uplifted, and I have had a better connection to my spirituality. You even have left a bad taste in my mouth. It is for these reasons that I am changing our relationship. We will now have to be just casual acquaintances, only having you on special occasions. I know that what we had was very long term, but I just can't see having you around in my daily life anymore. You will always have a special place in my heart.

Sincerely,
Jasmine

Spring Cleaning: The Body.

Very seldom do we think of spring cleaning to take time to pamper ourselves.. but with all the changes going on with the earth, what a better time to take some time for yourself. Being a mom usually means that our needs tend to come last. But doing something great for yourself is a must to keep yourself going for the benefit of your children... and we all know that. Keeping our bodies clean and healthy is a great way to lift your spirits and guide your spirituality to new places.

-Take a super long bath once a week during the spring. Get new soaps and razors and sponges and enjoy your bath time.

-Give up a bad habit. Do you smoke? Drink coffee? Eat fast food? have a secret stash of twinkies? Guzzle pop by the 2 liter? Take spring cleaning as a time to give up one of these habits, in the best way for you..even if this means slowly weaning yourself or going cold turkey.

-Do a body cleanse. I know I love the feeling I get when I have eaten a very healthy meal or eaten light for a few days.. it feels amazing! There are many ways to get this feeling.. from detox tea, fasting, drinking extra water or green tea. Cleaning out your body is a great way to kick off spring.

-Take up a new form of exercise. Trying something new can be such a mood booster.. and lets face it we all could exercise more. Have a yoga class you have always wanted to take? Or the belly dance DVD you have sitting in the cabinet? Try something new and different.

-Get a pedicure... because you know you want nice soft pretty feet for flip flop season.

-Start a new Diet. Shed those pounds you have been wanting to loose, eat healthier and start making healthier meals for you and your family.

-Be a goddess.. because you are one!

Spring Cleaning: The Physical.

I have made huge spring cleaning lists in the past where it covers 4 pages of stuff I would like to get done, complete with highlighted items and check marks the works. Spring cleaning is always an exciting time for Virgos. However, I have found with time that other methods work better for me. I like to consider spring cleaning a joyous time and a part of a journey. I consider this time of year a way to get out the old and let in the new. So I like to crack windows and let in fresh air, smudge, light candles and of course play music. So here are my tips for getting your house ready for spring:

-set the mood that best helps you clean, and find ways to minimize distractions.

-go room to room and deep clean one at a time, covering everything from top to bottom.

-work from the inside out starting in late winter moving to early spring for indoors and later spring for the outdoors.

-take advantage of wonderful weather...even cracking a window on a 40 degree day can help boost your mood and help get germs out of the air in your home.

-Get rid of any old items that you know you don't need. Getting rid of clutter will help the energy flow in your home, boost your mood and help you keep your home clean in the future.

-Rotate toys, it will help keep old ones interesting and in better condition.

Spring Cleaning

It is February and my least favorite month. The dreariness of the outdoors always bothers me, a combination of gray skies, dirty snow on the roads, cold. But as soon as Imbolc comes I find myself wanting to start my spring cleaning. For us this year it was actually on Imbolc that we started our list. We even took a night where we sent the kiddo over to Grandmas house and spent the entire night deep cleaning our house.

Spring Cleaning is a natural part of life, and it has been practiced in many cultures for centuries. In modern American culture, most people focus on just cleaning the home. But It doesn't have to be just cleaning your home. In the next few weeks we will discuss in detail several areas of "cleaning" including physical, emotional, body and spirit.

And just a heads up to all of my readers.. My laptop broke recently so my time online is now limited.. hope to be back in full swing soon.

The Spiritually Sound To Do List

I have a massive to do list right now..Between taxes, my laptop dying, laundry and being sick earlier this week, and making and putting up valentines decorations, I have a ton of things I need to get done. How do I not let it bother me and get myself stressed out? How do I keep my very Virgo self from raging on the inside when I have so much to do? Well here are a few steps I take when I have a giant to do list:

-Set up to have a relaxing mood. Sometimes I will start by smudging the areas I need to get done... working my intent to get it done in a timely fashion into the mix. I will then light a few candles and turn on some calming music (I have a Jasmine's Peace Mix on Pandora just for this usage). Also being in comfortable clothing helps to keep your mind on the tasks at hand.

-Do the item with the most visual impact first..If your laundry is taking up half the space in your hallway being sorted into piles or your dishes are filling the sink and part of the counter..tackle this first.. seeing a difference will help you feel more accomplished with all the tasks at hand.

-Praise yourself with every item you cross off your list...take a 5 minute breather or enjoy a cup of tea or coffee as a reward..you got it done YAY!

-Do not feel ashamed if you have to ask for help..passing off an item or 2 to a spouse or helper will just take the weight of it off your shoulders and help you to get more done.

-Plan a very special time for yourself when you are done. like reading a book, a long shower or a glass of wine..plan to put your feet up and enjoy the fact that you are DONE!

Take the Challenge!

In my last post I challenged everyone to learn about a different path for one moon cycle. Here are the complete details of that challenge, which I hope we find several people to try this.

Please comment here or email me directly (jasminemoon@gmail.com with the topic TSM Challenge) stating the following:

- Your name
- Your Current Path
- The path you will be trying
- When you will be starting your month.
- Any concerns or roadblocks you fear you may face.


When you are done with your month I will post a Post here and describe what I found and my experiences with this different path. I plan to include:

A book list of things I read, a list of websites I surfed, a brief description of things I tried and my over all feelings towards the path.

In turn I will share with you my details:

-Jasmine
-Gardnerian and Kitchen Witch
-Solitary Eclectic Pagan
-Today
-I got sold all of my solitary eclectic books years ago and I will really have to look at the books I currently have to find some really eclectic stuff.

Opening Yourself and Your family to All Paths

One of the topics I read about and have seen often in my internet travels is Pagans who disagree with the paths of other pagans and spiritual paths. I find this an odd thing because many pagans will claim to be open minded and want others to be open minded to their beliefs. The reality of open mindedness when it comes to faith is actually a very difficult journey for some. I know for me personally I have no interest being involved in Dogmatic Christianity. I have struggled with this for a while because I do not like when Christians tell me I am a bad person for following my heart. But I still see beauty in that path and try to keep an open mind, but I do not agree with it and do not participate in it.. I struggle with the idea of letting my son go to a church. We are raising him without a particular faith and allowing him to choose when he is ready. But the idea of taking him to a church is very "bah". But what about other pagan paths? Yes there are some I would rather him not participate in, but in general I hope that he learns about as many as possible. When the time comes I will help him if he asks and until then we will look at as many faiths as we can together as a family.

I have a challenge for you...

I would like to see pagans look into and study in as much depth as possible a different pagan path or tradition other than their own for one moon cycle. This includes reading books on that tradition, researching it on the net, maybe even looking at some message boards and immersing into the path as well as possible.. and finally for extra credit, attending a ritual of this pagan path if able. I would then like to see a written account of what you liked what you didn't like and what you learned. I am even willing to share your experiences here at The Spiritual Mother. And I would love to know that you plan to do this.. what say ye?

Making Nap Time Spiritually Blissful

Nap time is a great time for bonding on a spiritual level and teaching meditation to young children. A mixture of meditation techniques and healthy sleeping techniques and Reiki can make a wonderful afternoon. Here is a break down of things I do with my own son and my Day Care children to help them fall asleep:

-Set the mood; darken the room, put on some tranquil music (we use Pandora's Nature Sounds Radio), use aromatherapy candles or oils, set up a sacred nap time space. Include many soft surfaces like pillows and blankets or comforters.

-Prepare the child by setting up a daily routine. This may include finishing lunch and putting on the music and darkening the room 10 minutes before hand. Stay away from any exciting activities and treat pre-nap time as "wind down" time. You can also add in hygiene practices such as hand washing (a mini ritual bath) and tooth brushing. Read a book out loud to them for extra Credit.

-Prepare yourself. "Are the dishes done? Did I pay the bills? What time is DH going to be home?" A woman's brain can get pretty active. Clearing it out and getting into a calm place helps so much when helping a child to nap. Find ways to calm quickly, such as a worry stone in your pocket, of taking a few breaths of fresh air. Ground and Center.

-Lay the child down, and give them any lovies such as a binky, stuffed toy or a blankey. I tend to cover the child with a blanket covering most of their bodies including their eyes, but leaving room for them to breath. I find this helps them know its nap time and know that I am putting them down for a nap.

- Gently rub their backs in a circular motion, moving to a more massage type touch. Gently massage the child's back while focusing on them being calm and relaxed. Think of this as an energy transfer and concentrate on putting them in a state of relaxation and sleep. Once child is in a state of sleep or extreme calm, feel free to switch to Reiki to help balance the chakras. If is a smaller infant feel free to rock them to sleep, but you can still use massage and healing touch techniques.

-Give the child time to get into deep sleep before leaving the room or getting up. Helping the child by just being in the room for these times helps greatly from them waking up and having to start over. Keep your energy focused during this time. If you are able and want to you can also join your child in a nap.

-If you choose to stay awake, use the quiet time to relax or meditate and recharge in your own way. This is a perfect time for a cup of coffee or tea.

The Mandatory Book List

I notice allot of people these days claim the title of Wiccan. The impression that I get is that they read one book and then think that this makes them a Wiccan. So here is my version of a book list that I expect anyone who claims the name Wiccan to have read before they announce to the world "I am Wiccan!" regardless of if they are solitary eclectic or a more traditional Wiccan path. As a Veteran to the craft, if I am in a conversation with a person who claims to know anything about Wicca, I automatically assume they have read the following:

Scott Cunningham's Guide to the Solitary Practitioner- If you follow my blog you know I am not that much of a fan of Cunningham.. however in this day and age every pagan has read this book. If you read this book and find yourself moved by its pages, Wicca is probably not for you.. However even if you like the book or not it is essential to understanding the ideals of Solitary Eclectics.

Raymond Buckland's Big Blue "Complete Book of Witchcraft"- its basic and covers many topics, this used to be a standard newbie book in the day, and now I get the impression that many pagans have no idea what this book is. It is a surface scratch for Wicca.

The Ferrar's Witches Bible- This covers a good chunk of info such as Sabbats and tools and all that good stuff..if you haven't read it and are calling yourself Wiccan.. you might as well be a rocket scientist who has never taken a calculus class.

Margret Adler's Drawing Down the Moon- This was once must read book for pagans back before Barnes and Noble had a New Age section... so yes you should read it.

Any Book by Gerald Gardner- because no matter what you believe, you can not do a ritual or study any form of Neo-Paganism without coming into contact with something Gardner did for the craft.. Yes the books are very boring.. and can take you almost a year of reading while on the toilet..but if you can actually get through one of these books you will be that much closer to understanding at least part of the history of American Wicca.

At least 10 other books- it doesn't matter what they are but paganism in general is about life long learning, and if you are going to claim to be on this type of path, as a fellow pagan, I expect you to honor the idea of being on a path to wisdom.

Attachment DayCare???

So.. what exactly is that? Well I run an in home day care and I run home on the principals of Attachment Parenting with all the children. It means that I do not use CIO, I hold babies and children when they want to be held, I help parents with breastfeeding, I cloth diaper my own child and some of my daycare children, and I baby wear. Is it easy? No, but definitely worth it! I have a goal with each child in my care to build a trusting relationship. I follow the goals of PITC (Providing Infant and Toddler Care Program) to help build a strong basis of continuity and to facilitate learning and positive relationships starting at birth. The bond that I have with all the children is deep and loving. Yes that means that if I leave the room to potty that 3 of them will cry because they can't see me. Yes it means some days I have to wear a baby around the house and whisper for 3 hours because they are napping in my Maya Wrap. Yes it means I have to plan our lunches around the baby so they can have homemade babyfood. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. I not only get to have a strong bond with my son (which never could be replaced by anyone) but I also get to have great day care kids that I get to spend the day with. I am a lucky woman!

Medela I'm Calling You Out!

Just this morning, one of my Favorite bloggers, Amy West of "Just West of Crunchy" (check out the new button on my side bar), wrote a piece about Medela. She discussed how Medela was violating the WHO code in depth and how it denigrates breast feeding awareness. She also covers issues with their pumps and why other brands are superior. I am here to tell you a story of an infant that we shall call Steve (not real name) and the effects the Medela bottles had on him. If Medela had breastfeeding, or infants at all in mind in correlation with their products, an adorable little boy would have had a very different start in life.

A few weeks ago a fellow Day Care Provider called me on the phone and said she had a small infant that she could not care for anymore. He was very clingy and cried all the time and she couldn't handle it and knew that my care would be best for him. I run my day care on the principals of Attachment Parenting and I have apparently started to get a name for myself with this concept in our town. I said yes that I would take him (because every child deserves a chance and I am always up for a challenge). So when this little boy started, on his first day, Mom came with a Medela brand bottle and asked me to only use this bottle even though I provide bottles in my care and use Born Free brand. Mom and baby had issues at birth and had a failed breastfeeding relationship. I said yes and used the Medela bottle. I quickly noticed in my care that this infant was extremely gassy, and also suffered from "raspiness" having difficult breathing after feedings. At home the breathing has been an issue and he had been put on a nebulizer to help with the issues. So even though mom asked me to only use the Medela bottles, I secretly tried out my Born Free bottles on him, which have a vent system in place. After only a few bottles mr. crankymcfussy pants was a new baby. He was smiling after a feeding and spitting up less (his first day when I only used the Medela bottles, he spit up on me so many times I went through 3 outfits), and he was less cranky in general. I continued to use the Born Free bottles on him a few more times and tried the Medela's several other times. He was always cranky after the Medela's. I began to also notice that his breathing improved when I used the Born Free bottles. I let Mom know that I thought he had some gas and suggested the use of a bottle with a venting system. Mom was reluctant to try them but after I sent a bottle of mine home with her, a few days later he was sent with a vented Avent bottle. Just last night I asked her if she had noticed a difference with her son and she opened up to me. She said he was a new baby and everyone was having a better time. It turns out that at home he was super fussy and even at one point, when Grandma was babysitting one evening, she called them and sent him home because she could not take the crying. Now she had a "new baby" and she was smiling for the first time since I met her. If this baby had been given a decent bottle from the start, he would have had a better relationship with his parents and family and probably would have never come to my care. It is a shame that a 4 month old should have to go through this when he is learning just how the world works. I hope to see many more improvements over time with Steve.

If Medela was serious about their bottles, and catering to the needs of infants, they would supply a bottle for mothers with their pumps and in their systems that actually helped infants. A glance at the Medela site offers no support in the lines of actually feeding an infant. What is the difference between their bottles and a cheap old bottle from the Walmart? None. I challenge Medela to change their bottles to fit the needs of all babies. How about a vent system to start with. A breast fed infant does not have to stop nursing at his mothers breast to let air in. And lets further discuss the nipple. How about making a variety of shapes that closer resemble a womans breast? Breast fed babies have more of a challenge at times in the child care setting getting familiar with a bottle nipple when away from the breast. If you really as a company want to promote breast feeding and supplying nursing mothers with a way to give expressed milk to an infant, why not develop a product that supports mothers and infants? It seems to me that Medela has one thing in mind.. making money. Because if you were serious about supporting and promoting breastfeeding, the products you offer would be way different.

Spirituality on the Clock

In this day and age we are forced to work in society and hold jobs to survive. Our pagan ancestors lived very different lives than us. They were able to be in the natural environment allot of the times they were working. For us many of us spend time in the corporate world trying to make a buck at the mercy of the system. I am one of the lucky ones that works for themselves. Yes I have more freedoms than most, but I too have to work hard and rarely have time to focus on my spirituality for that part of the day. Working by myself and noting having coworkers has allowed me to find ways to let in my spirituality for those 8 hours a day where I am focusing on my work. But we can find ways to be spiritual in the work place without outing ourselves as Wiccan or Pagan. Here are some techniques to think about:

-Keep a small ritual kit in your bag or coat. This can include a few stones or a figurines, herbs, essential oils, sea salt. Any items to help you center when needed.

-Keep a live plant at your desk, unless you are lucky enough to work outside. Take time to nurture the plant and allow the natural energy to come to you when needed.

-Have a small collection of the 4 elements such as a stone, a candle, a mini fountain or bottle of water and a feather or book.

-Ground when needed.. because what better way to deal with a boss/client who pisses you off?

-Wear or keep in your pocket a mojo bag with items that help you feel connected.

-Take meditation breaks.. if smokers get to go outside now and then.. why can't you? Everyone needs fresh air.

-Listen to nature sounds or meditation music on your break.

-Take your shoes off (actually since I work at home I never wear shoes..) and feel the ground beneath your feet.

-Write in your journal and read when ever you can.

-Sneak in moments of your secret indulgences such as chocolate.. or even the occasional online forum or blog.

so how do you connect to your spiritual side on the clock?

Snow Days

Its the dead of winter and snow is falling...in fact all but a few states have snow on the ground right now. this time of year has come with a stigma for "the winter blues". A Native American spiritualist and tribe member once described it to me as Wendigo, when the dark spirts get trapped in our homes and need light to get out, causing us to feel trapped and down in the dumps. There are ways to get around this though, on a spiritual and mundane level. Here are some ideas to try:

- Open the shades to your home and let the natural light in. It will help you see the outdoors more and help calm you down.

-listen to music or nature sounds.

-Read a few extra books..might as well while we have this extra time indoors.. save more free time for the warmer months to spend time outside.

-work on a craft project...make something new for your altar or ritual use, such as jewelry.

-Do a total house cleansing, including reorganizing areas and smudging the entire home.

-participate in new online forums.. explore a few that spark your interest and get to know more people.

-go to a pagan coffee social, or invite a local pagan over for a nice discussion.. since it never hurts to meet new people.

-get some indoor plants to nurture and help cleanse the air.

-meditate in front of a window and just watch nature for a period of time.

-Redecorate a room.. feel free to do something wild (I am currently planning on painting my hallway to look like a cave with cave paintings)

-do your taxes and plan to get something special (unless you owe money).

-Write in a journal...or BOS.

-learn a new form of divination.

-contemplate things you would like to work on yourself through the rest of the year.

-Take a snow day.. complete with jammies and hot chocolate.

Organic Bunny Crackers

I have never met a child who didn't like organic bunny shaped graham crackers. If you put them on the plate they will eat them. I have been finding these awesome little treats in Walmart recently.. YA Walmart, in our small town in Iowa with less than 7000 people, we have organic bunny crackers. But this is Walmart we are talking about, you know the giant supermarket chain that is the epitome of all things evil (right after Starbucks) and doesn't care about our health just how to make a buck? Well the organic winds have changed and now even I in small town Iowa do not have to wait for the Amish to make a cracker snack for my child that is healthy, or just end up eating goldfish. What's next, pagan books in the check out lane?

The Fading Face to Face

I have been on a break for the last few weeks, a mixture of being on vacation with the fam out east, and having a new day care child that doesn't sleep during nap times... whoops there went my daily blogging hour! It is funny to me the posts that I see on pagan message boards when I come back from an extended leave. There are always a few newbies asking for book recommendations, and a ton of replies suggesting Cunningham. And a few spell begging posts, and people asking about recommendations for their witches bottles or the sort, and the occasional post about what people are doing the nearest holiday, and a collection of a few other fluff pieces. And now we also have the Youtube videos. This is the one that is new to me. When I was a newbie, you had to seek out the nearest pagan meet up and then attend and sit around a camp fire or coffee cup and enjoy conversations with the elder folk. So now we don't have to do that.. we can just sit in front of our computer and watch a video or 20 about random pagan topics and cut out the face to face time with the crones. To me this was a very important lesson. Sitting around and learning how to show respect to elders of the community and learn to ask questions and hear the stories of the past was a wonderful time. Not only was it a learning experience, but it was a fun one where we got to hear the inner workings of naughty crones and have a community. It also kept alive an oral tradition that pagan folk have enjoyed for millenniums. I feel that this lack of community is hurting pagans more than helping them. Technological pagans in our times have the benefit of gathering large amounts of information on their own. This is an amazing advance for us. But by letting the face to face, no electronic devices needed convos die out, we are loosing so much. Meeting "face to face" allowed for pagans to form communities, even if it was solitaries meeting each other for special holidays. It allowed a sharing of ritual and things we probably normally wouldn't have research (internet or not) on our own. It was a way to learn crafts, food, survival skills, music, buy homemade goods and more within the pagan community. It tested boundaries with different lifestyles such as naturist, vegan, poly-amorous, and more. Now pagans can just log onto Youtube and watch the newest pagan- Julia Child give the best recipes to pagan bliss. And I know some people have trouble finding meet ups and gatherings, but that is part of it. You have to work to find it, it is supposed to be a journey.

Orange Peels

This the season that oranges and tangerines are in season, if you are like us you eat allot of them, they are like winters candy. Before you throw away your orange peels try these tried and true kitchen witch uses for orange peels:

1.) Throw them in a pot with water, cinnamon, a dash of cloves and ginger, a bit of vanilla extract and simmer on low..it makes your house smell like "Yule"

2.) Save them for after you do your dishes and grind them down the disposal, it will make your sink smell great instead of like old food or soap.

3.) Hand grate them and use the zest for cooking.

4.) bend them back and release the oils into the air for air freshener.

5.) dry them and use for potpourri or incense.

6.) squeeze out the oil and add to your favorite home made cleaner for an extra cleaning boost and fresh scent.

7.) let them sit in some olive oil and use over a salad.. yum!

8.) use the straight oil to remove sticky gunk...same as the actual cleaner.. just bend the peel to release the oil and you have it for free.

Looming Aloneness

My husband starts training for his CDL tomorrow.. and after 3 weeks-ish of training and working to get the license, he will be going on a one month long trip on the road. He may be gone on each trip for 3-4 weeks at a time. Knowing that this time we have had the last few weeks could be the most we see each other for the next few months has been the hardest part. Trying to spend time together without spending too much time getting annoyed with each other is rough. Our nerves are on edge, but we all know this is the best thing for us long term. If my husband puts 12 months on the road for this large company, he will be able to get hired anywhere making great money, and securing our families future. And I do have goals for personal growth and for my son while he is gone.. but first step is getting used to being the only parent around most of the time while my husband is gone.. first we get that taken care of.. then we move onto the goals.

Early Sunday Mornings

You never thought that waking up early on a Sunday morning was ever going to be a good thing did you? Of course no one wants to be up early.. but around 7ish you hear "Mommy.. Mommy.. Cereal" and it is so darn cute you can't resist the call to get out of bed and go get them the biggest bowl of cereal you have ever made...your head is in a daze because you really could have used any more sleep that you could have gotten. But watching your little one chow down on cereal and slurp bananas and milk is just priceless.. you can't even remember making the bowl.. but you just sit in a meditative trance wishing for coffee to make itself.. while they enjoy every bite. They take their 3/4 eaten bowl to the sink and spill the milk on the floor.. and say UT OHH.. and you hand them a towel and they wipe it up with joy.. and you sit back and wonder "how did I get so lucky".

Why I Don't like Cunningham

Due to the response of several of you guys and on several message boards, It has been asked of me to elaborate why I am not a fan of Cunningham.

My Disclaimer: I like things in its truest form.. like pizza. I am only a fan of pizza made in pizza places in NYC or mom and pop places.. I can't stand pizza hut or papa johns.. If I am going to eat tacos, I would rather have it at real Mexican restaurant instead of Taco Bell. I am this way with many things in my life, including Wicca. I am a traditionalist and I will always be that way. This is part of the reason I sought out traditional training with a lineaged coven over ten years ago. I wanted to learn what Wicca was and I felt that so many of the 101 books out there left many things unanswered.

When I was at the beginning of my spiritual path, I too read Cunningham. It was a good 15 years back, and I found his work to be decent at the time. But after reading more and learning more I found that this was not the case. Cunningham said I didn't need to go through training and that I could learn on my own.. and I did learn allot on my own. When I started getting more into the Wiccan way of life, I found over time that what Cunningham writes about is nothing like the Wicca that has been in our country for decades. Some of the only ways to fully experience the full spectrum of the Wiccan path is still to this day through training in a coven setting. Now Cunningham did start a movement in the pagan world that is a wonderful thing. He provided an easy form of practice for a solitary eclectic witch. However, the movement that he started is nothing at all like the Wicca that was brought to this country by Gerald Gardener. And at one point it has to be admitted that how this new form of witch craft and practice is presented, is no longer Wicca.

Say you are making apple sauce. You have your basic ingredients of water, sugar, apples and cinnamon. You start to make it and say to yourself that you want lots of cinnamon, so you add a little extra. You then add allot of water and it becomes soupy and has lots of chunks. You strain it.. and then you realize that you aren't left with applesauce at all. In fact you have made a wonderful glass of hot apple cider, the apple cider tastes wonderful. However, this drink is still not the same as applesauce. They may share similar origins, and ingredients, but they are not the same. This is allot like Cunninghams take on Wicca. He changes many things about traditional Wiccan practice and molds into something different. And the problem I have with it is that I don't want to buy a jar of apple sauce and get juice, and vice versa. I can go on and on about the changes he made and what is different and the whys and hows.. but really that is for each seeker to find on their own journey. Wicca in itself is a long journey that will take decades, if not the rest of your life, in study. If you really feel that reading a single book sets you out on a path and makes you an official Wiccan, than you have a longer journey than you think. And honestly, I feel sorry for those that are stuck in that mindset.

Back to the apple. It represents, in this analogy, paganism. Only you can decide how you want to eat the apple. There are so many ways to cook it from pies, butters, jellys, sauce, fritters.. I can go on and on. You as a pagan have to decide if you want to try just the juice and stick with that, or if you want to enjoy the many different ways you can eat an apple. Only you can make that choice. But remember, apple pie is not the same as apple chips.

Oy, I'm Hungry.

My Daily Facial

I have very sensitive oily skin.. do you know how hard that is to maintain? Most sensitive skin products do not clean the oil off my skin.. and the oily skin products make me break out because they are too strong. However, greening my daily facial care regimen was the best thing I have ever done.

-I wash every morning with Burt's Bees Soap Bark and Chamomile Deep Cleansing Cream. Not only does it clean well and very gently on my skin, it contains herbs that make my skin tingle and it always makes me feel cleaner. When I get out of the shower, my face feels so smooth and I love it. I will be using this soap for a very long time.

-When I get out of the shower I use Burt's Bees Rose Water and Glycerin Toner. This stuff is awesome! It makes me feel even cleaner and smells like heaven. I use it through out the day as well for times when I start getting oily in my T zone.. keeps me fresh all day.

-Lotion I only use sparingly, because my skin is so oily to begin with I rarely have dry skin unless it is the dead of winter. I use Burt's Bees Radiance Day Lotion, about the size of a half a pea and it is enough to keep my skin from ever drying out. I only use it if I am going to be in the sun all day or it is a very dry day.

After I switched to this daily routine I found that my skin was way healthier. I do not get acne anymore and I have even noticed that son dark aging spots I had developing faded away. I have a healthy youthful glow and I still get carded. I also rarely wear makeup at all..only to formal occasions. I have found that with using natural products my skin doesn't need to have make up on it barely at all. I highly suggest greening out your face.

The Bad Book List

The more pagan boards I surf, the more I notice that in general pagans these days are reading crap. Its like they get stuck on a certain type of Author and just stick with these books and never get onto books that will further their knowledge of the craft. So here is my guide to these books.. feel free to flame or comment away because I know that since so many pagans out there think these books are "gospel" that I am bound to piss off someone.

Lets Start with Cunningham..

...His books on herbalism are decent books, you can't go wrong with those in a collection. However, it seems like every pagan has read "Wicca A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner". And so many pagans take this to mean that Wicca is primarily a solitary faith and practice. Wicca was evolved by Gerald Gardner as a practice for covens and group work. I am not saying Solitary practice isn't a valid and beautiful path at all. I am saying that there is so much more out there to Wicca.. many things that are not in a book and can only be taught through experience with a group and that you shouldn't put yourself out on that because you feel that this book and the rest of cunninghams work is so awesome.. there is so much more out there.


Silver Raven Wolf

..She isn't called Silver Raven Twat for no reason. Not only is she criticized for being one of the worst pagan authors in history..but she has also been called unethical, a bigot, uneducated and an idiot. Not only did she publish a book geared for teens that makes Buffy look like an encyclopedia..but she also threatened one of my friends who wrote her about this book and told her she didn't think it was ethical to print it. An example of her work is that she actually recommends using Venus, a love goddess, in money magic...explain to me how that works.. please.

Laurie Cabot

Have you ever seen a video or picture with this woman in it??? Seriously.. if you were walking down the street and someone who wore more makeup than Elvira and Marilyn Manson came up to you and announced that they were the "official witch of Salem".. what would you say to them? Beyond the "books" cover.. this woman is extremely feminist.. she pays no attention to a god figure and her entire work is mainly about feminism. In my experience of 10 years being initiated I have found that most Wiccans are about balance.. between Male and Female. Going off what this woman says is purely one sided and you are missing an important half of the equation. Wiccan practice is about fertility.


Fiona Horne

In this day and age pagans should know better than to follow a person based on their looks.. if being a playboy model turned pagan is a way to get famous and sell books than we have huge problems here.

Most pagans became pagans in the first place because they questioned the bible..I just think that we all need to take a step back and give the same questions to pagan books too. To be continued..

Tooth Paste- where it all began.

My journey to switching over to green products started with tooth paste.. ya I know how lame does that sound? I have always had issues with tooth paste though even when I was a little girl. I think strong mint flavors taste like shit.. actually I would imagine that shit might taste better. Honestly who are they kidding with a burning sensation like that in your mouth? I tried every kind on the market in regular kinds.. but my gag reflex always gave in. Cinnamon and spear mint were my only options that didn't result in me trying not to puke every morning and evening.

Fast forward a bit to when I was pregnant. Tooth paste created my morning sickness problems... I swear by that to this day... I would start brushing and then the coughing fits came and then.. well you get my drift. I soon found myself steering towards kids tooth pastes.. the only one that worked Toms of Maine silly strawberry... it was a miracle at the time.

After pregnancy and the negative experiences with tooth paste I had.. I found myself with a different problem... that kids tooth paste just doesn't make my teeth feel clean enough. So I do like the Toms of Maine brand, it doesn't bother me taste wise, but my teeth do not feel their cleanest. I currently have a tube of Burts Bees.. now despite how thick it is.. I really feel very clean teeth. However the taste is less desirable.. I would love something a bit different, maybe since it has cranberry extract in it to help remove plaque..why not flavor it like cranberries.. just a thought!

The Green Makeover

I have been slowly switching to all natural and organic bath, body and other products the last few months. Part of my reasons for this is my incredibly sensitive skin and my wanting to do whats best for my health and the environment. I have been trying many different ones trying to find what is best for me. Over the next few weeks I will be reviewing the ones I have tried and offering what I have learned up to you. I will also be doing research about different products to get further understandings of the ingredients in the products we use on ourselves so that wise choices can be made. I hope you enjoy!

Magic of Curry

In our home, Curry Chicken is one of our favorite dishes, not only does it smell wonderful.. but it tastes even better. But today we will discuss its magical properties and break down the ingredients in this wonderful mix of spices.

"Most recipes and producers of curry powder usually include coriander, turmeric, cumin, fenugreek, and red pepper in their blends"


Coriander- Used in love charms and magic, what a great way to add a little love to your families diet :-)

Turmeric- research has found that the more you eat the lower your chance of cancer..I am sold! It has also been used for dyes in many Asian/Indian weddings.

Cumin- Brings peace and harmony to the home.

Fenugreek- not only good for increased breast milk supply, but aids in digestion, is considered an aphrodisiac and helps attract money.

Red Pepper- a fiery herb that is great for protection.

Ginger (which many blends have)- passion.


I don't know about you, but all of these magical uses sound like something I could definitely use more of in my home!

Okay.. I'll do it

I need to feel some comfort in our current financial situation so here goes my first attempt to do some prosperity magic in a long time. Not sure what I am going to do exactly, but I know for sure that it is the full moon and this will be the best time to do some magic. I know I have some green stones around somewhere.. maybe I should just consecrate a bracelet or the sort.. who knows.

Times of Blah

So this week my husband lost his job..it was a mixture of mismanagement and his own damn fault. It has been time for him to move on for a while now, as he has had this Job for 6 years and was not getting anywhere with it..and barely had gotten any raises since starting... he had already been looking into new jobs.. and was severely depressed when he figured out that he would make more money as a garbage man instead of taking care of delinquent youth. I am just sick of the financial crap that is going on.. everyone is feeling it.. you know you are. Is it even worth it to do prosperity magic? why bother going to my basement and pulling out supplies and setting up an altar when the entire country has no money left to go around. Have you also noticed that the ones who aren't struggling right now are the ones who don't need it.. you know that gay friend from high school who wastes money on a new car to match his outfit and a matching Iphone every 6 months... or the girl who was a major bitch in high school who posts pictures of herself on facebook in a drunken state of delirium..why do I have her as a friend anyway? I am just so over this backassed karma thing.. I do good for me and my family and my community and then I am faced with just another hurdle and seemingly endless array of obstacles that just block out what I want next for myself in my life for myself and family. I try to stay positive but I know the reality of it all. It is most likely best that I do not break out the gear and do some prosperity work.. my energy is so off and frustrated that I would probably end up having a person die and leave me money.. and it would be someone who was not ready to go.. that is just my luck.

Fall- a concious stream.

I just love this season. The leaves changing to warm hues and the air getting cooler.. warm cider with cinnamon and a bunch of cinnamon candles scent your house while cookies bake in the oven. Watching your family rake the yard and see your son hop around the yard with his own real rake made of metal and wood and its even his size!...the sound of the acorns pop pop popping in the fire pit with the burning leaves. Sleeping with the windows open and 3 blankets.. listening to your son yell around the house "FUUUUUUUUU" while holding up the Kung Fu Panda DVD. Watching the Hawkeyes and having a beer.. and then rubbing it in to my east coast friends when we kick penn states ass.. yep its lower case for a reason. I honestly did wear a hawkeye shirt to the blue and white penn state party back home in Jersey.. it was really blue and white. Venison chilli with 4 kinds of beans.. mmmm with crackers crumbled on top and a bit of cheese. I think I am already craving turkey..definitely stuffing and cranberry sauce. We will be in line at ToysRus @ midnight before you know it..well only us crazy ones. Does the goddess ever have to wait in lines? Does Hades have bathrooms? Persephone will soon know...if she eats the pomegranate she will have to go. But for now I must blow out my candles and open the windows and find my 4 pillows.. and blankets.. ahh the scent of campfire lingers on the breeze from our burning leaves..I cozy down in my bed and drift down to dreamland like the leaves on the trees.

The "Would Be" Peace

It is a lazy Sunday morning.. the entire family has slept in till 8:30 (a huge deal!) I have gotten out of bed and made banana pancakes, and put on my Pandora station and made myself coffee. All is going well... minus my 2 year old having a random freak out about some unknown factor. It never fails does it? you almost find a moment of pure blissful peace.. and then SCREAM!

The Switch

So recently with in the past few days since the Harvest moon, a full moon on the first day of fall, I have been feeling buzzed with energy. This is not a very often occurrence for me as you know. I have just been aching to read and do magic. I don't get it. How can I just go from blah to woohoo like the flip of a switch?

Labor Day...Literally!

This weekend, while most families are enjoying the "last weekend of summer" My family and I have been been doing a major cleaning spree. We have literally done 10 or more loads of laundry, washing all the bedding and summer clothes, fall clothes.. yep done it. In fact I was up till 2 am folding last night.. But the end product is what it is all about.. a clean home that is ready to get harvest decor and warm candles and warm fall goodness!